Dharius Daniels - Don't Foul Out

First Corinthians chapter number 13, listen to what Paul says: love is patient, love is kind. Love does not envy, love does not boast, love is not proud. Love does not dishonor others, love is not self-seeking, and it is not easily angered. It keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. It’s talking about the end times. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when completeness comes, what is in part will disappear. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me.

I want to use some basketball imagery as the topic of today’s teaching. I want to talk from this subject: «Family, don’t foul out.» I want to be your referee today and encourage you with these words: don’t foul out. I would like to begin our time together by articulating an axiom that I came across while doing some personal development study a couple of weeks ago. For those of you who like to take notes, I want you to write this down. I think it’s important to do this because I want you to follow me here: nobody remembers sermons; you remember statements. You don’t remember sermons; you remember statements, stories, and statements. I talked last week; I don’t know everything, but I talked last week, and I wrote the sermon. So, whenever there’s a statement that may add value to your life, you want to make sure you make it sticky for you. Here it is: some advancement comes from elimination. I’m going to say it again: some advancement comes from elimination. In other words, there’s some improvement, not some improvement, excuse me, that is experienced not based on what we start doing, but some improvement is automatically experienced based on what we stop doing.

Therefore, ladies and gentlemen, if couples are going to constantly and consistently see growth in their relationship, they must regularly and consistently ask this question: not just what do we need to start, but also what do we need to stop? Did you hear what I just said? Yeah, because some advancement—this is a life principle—only comes from elimination. Some things automatically improve, not by starting something new, but by stopping something old. Do you know that some things can get better health-wise if we just stop some things? Come on, right? Do we know some things can get better mentally if we just stop some things? Isn’t it what the Bible teaches? Doesn’t the Bible teach that your intake affects your outcome? Right? So, in other words, there’s no way to realistically expect to have a peaceful mind if I am constantly ingesting negative things. Isn’t that what Paul says in Philippians 4 when he is teaching people a blueprint and a path to peace and the proper attitude? Isn’t that what he says? «Whatever is lovely, whatever is good, whatever is of good report—if there be any virtue, if there be any praise, think on these things.» Right? Because some things get better, not by starting something new, but by stopping something old.

And so, some relationships will experience advancement when they practice the art of elimination. I think this is, in some sense, the heart of what the Apostle Paul is articulating in our text in First Corinthians chapter number 13. Here, in his description of love, I love this! When we look at the way Paul—remember, we’re talking about love and basketball—and when we look at the way Paul describes love, I love this! I love the way he describes love. The way Paul describes love: look at this! He not only talks about what love does; he talks about what love doesn’t do. Come on! He not only says what love is; he also states what love is not. Love does not envy, love does not boast, love is not proud, love does not dishonor others, love is not self-seeking, is not easily angered, and does not keep a record of wrongs because love doesn’t just make you—here it is! Are y’all ready for this? Love doesn’t just make you start some things; love will make you stop! Whoo! That’s a word for somebody right there!

Yeah, if they see—here it is—the problem isn’t sometimes that they don’t love you; it’s just that they’re loving you with an inferior love. What Paul is exposing is a different kind of love that is spiritual in nature, and that is the type of love that God intended to be the glue to bind two people together until death do them part. See, this kind of love Paul is talking about is the only love that’ll make it last forever. If you’re old school, put «preach» in the chat! Yeah, he’s trying—he’s introducing people who think they understand love to a distinctive kind of love. Come on! He’s talking to believers in the Greco-Roman culture; they’ve got all of these different words for love: phileo, storge, eros—they’ve got all of these different words for love. They think they understand love, and Paul says, «I need to show you there’s another level of this, that what you’ve been calling love may be love, but it’s an inferior one that will not give us the kind of results we want.» I’m not saying—see, oh my—see, sometimes the issue isn’t someone loving you more; it’s them loving you differently. Yeah, don’t just love me more because—