Dharius Daniels - I Want What I Want

Verse 9 says that David was afraid of the Lord that day, and he said, «How can the Ark of the Lord come to me?» So David would not move the Ark of the Lord with him into the city of David, but he took it aside into the house of Obed-Edom. The Ark of the Lord remained in the house of Obed-Edom for three months, and the Lord blessed Obed-Edom and all his household. Now it was told to King David, saying, «The Lord has blessed the house of Obed-Edom and all that belongs to him because of the Ark of God.» So David went and brought up the Ark of God from the house of Obed-Edom to the city of David with gladness. And so it was that when those bearing the Ark of the Lord had gone six paces, he sacrificed oxen and fatted sheep. Then David danced before the Lord with all his might, and David was wearing a linen ephod. I want to stop right there and give a title to this text; it’s the first sermon in this PDA series. Here’s the topic—I’m gonna see if y’all feel me on this. On this first Sunday in February, I want what I want. I think you can get louder than that, ATL! New Jersey Global, I want what I want! Well, family, several years ago, an amazing author named Gary Chapman penned one of the most beneficial pieces of work on relationships entitled The Five Love Languages. In his work, Chapman argues that in the context of a relationship, love must not only be declared; love should be demonstrated. I needed to hear a bigger «Amen» than that! He argues that love must be more than professed and possessed. He argues that if there’s going to be fulfillment in the relationship, love must be practiced. Watch what he says: love should not just be felt strongly; it should be shown effectively. Doing so requires understanding your partner’s love language. Chapman says love languages are the ways people receive and express love in a relationship. It is one of the ways people get their relational needs met. You’ve got spiritual needs, emotional needs, physical needs, financial needs, and nobody judges you for those needs. I wish somebody would talk back to me today! But somehow, in some way, some of our relational needs are treated as secondary and optional issues, as if to suggest that my physical needs are necessary, but my relational needs are options. What you are doing then is telling me I can only shop in one store, but you refuse to put what I need on the shelf. I thought I would get better «Amens» than that! Yes, yes! See, love languages are rooted in the revelation that just because a person expresses love one way doesn’t mean that’s the way the other person receives it. Therefore, fulfillment in relationships takes more than effort. We’re walking heavy this morning. It’s about to get more spicy; buckle up! It takes more than effort; it takes understanding. Let me see if you can handle this: just because you’re trying hard doesn’t mean you’re doing good. I’m gonna go over here because I meant what I said, and I’m not taking it back. Let me say it one more time: just because you’re trying hard doesn’t mean you’re doing good. We must learn our partner’s love languages so that the effort we make is aligned with what they need, so that we give them what they need, not what we want them to have. There is very little that is more frustrating than being in a relationship where you are forced to live without what you need because the person you’re with is intent on giving you what they want you to have, what they think you should appreciate, what they believe should meet your needs because it meets their needs. But we’re two different people, and we don’t need the same thing. If you give me what I want and I give you what you want, we’ll both have what we want, because I want what I want! I want to know, am I talking to anybody in the A? Is anybody in New Jersey saying, «I’m old enough now not to second-guess or be confused about what I want»? I’ve been through enough relationships, situationships, and sneaky links to know exactly what I want! I’m grown, and I’m clear. Silly rabbit, tricks are for kids! If you come around here, I need you serious. I’m not a kid; I’m not confused. I’m grown; I know what I need! I’ve lived long enough and been in enough bad situations to know exactly what I’m not tolerating. I’m not stuck up; I’m just seasoned enough to see real quick before the appetizers come, «This ain’t working.» Am I talking to anybody that’s honest enough to admit, you know before the appetizers come, «This ain’t gonna work»? They’re sitting there talking to you about next time, and you’re saying to yourself, «We are never going out again.» But here’s what’s interesting about love languages: when you show the right love language, not only does it benefit your partner; it also benefits you. I said when you show the right love language, not only does it benefit your partner; when you show the right love language, it benefits you! Apostle Darius, are you saying that I benefit when my partner gets their needs met? Don’t you mean my partner benefits when they get their needs met? Yeah, but you also benefit when they get their needs met. As a matter of fact, when you tap into the right frequency, you get a version of that person nobody else gets. Did you hear?