What’s up? Listen to me; there’s something I need to tell you real quick. It’s okay for you to hurt their feelings. Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Darius, you’ve gone off the deep end. This is extreme, this is illogical, this is unspiritual, this is not scriptural. What do you mean it’s okay to hurt their feelings? Listen to me; I want you to hear what I said, but I also want you to hear what I didn’t say. I didn’t say we should try to hurt their feelings; I didn’t say we shouldn’t care if people’s feelings are hurt. But I am saying that there are times when it is not only okay to hurt someone’s feelings, but it is necessary to do so. Now, watch this; I’m not saying you should do anything intentionally to hurt someone’s feelings. I am saying that you should love people’s futures more than their feelings, and you should be willing to say something that might hurt their feelings if it’s going to save their future. I’m going to go so far as to say this: if you are not willing to love someone well enough to share a truth that may hurt their feelings but has the potential to save their future, you are not serving them; you are pleasing them. Sometimes, when we serve people—and all of us should be serving people, right? I mean, whatever we’re doing, it’s an act of service. As a spiritual leader, I’m serving people, but also as an entrepreneur, I’m serving people. Entrepreneurship is an instrument that God uses to deliver value; it is an instrument that God uses to deliver value to other people. But it’s service, man; it is serving people. We should all be serving each other, and sometimes, when you’re serving people, you get to please them. But sometimes, serving people means not saying things or doing things that might be pleasurable at the moment. Now, I know you want to know where this is coming from. Where did you get this? This is actually something I shared with our leadership team on the church side because I was reading something that the Apostle Paul wrote. He’s writing to believers in Corinth, and this is what he says; it was so profound to me. He says, «Listen, I wrote to you earlier, and I had to say"—I’m paraphrasing—"I had to say some hard things, and some of the hard things that I had to say made you feel bad.» Then he said, «I started to feel bad that you felt bad.» But then I saw something; I saw that the godly sorrow that you experienced actually produced repentance. What is repentance? Repentance is not an apology; repentance is not remorse; repentance is not «I promise I’ll never do it again.» What is repentance? Repentance literally means you turn—a change of mind that produces a change of direction. So if I’m heading in one direction and then I make a U-turn to the other direction, I have repented. Paul said, «I saw that that godly sorrow actually produced a U-turn in you. It produced repentance. It produced the fruit of repentance.» So, sharing this with our leadership team, we should be sensitive to people’s feelings. We should never try to hurt people’s feelings; we should never say anything without regard for people’s feelings. But we cannot allow our desire—our intention—not to hurt people’s feelings to cause us to avoid saying a truth or saying it in a way that it needs to be said. That is a completely different conversation, right? Because there are times when right things specifically need to be said. There was this man, the name of the book escapes me, but years ago there was a book on leadership axioms. One of them was, «Say the last 10 percent.» You know how sometimes you’re like, okay, you say the little 90, but then that last 10 you hold back? Now, I’m not talking about saying the last 10 to be rude or saying the last 10 just to vent, to get things off your chest. But the author was saying that sometimes that last 10 percent needs to be said because it clearly communicates what needs to be changed. You need to say that last 10 percent because you need to value their calling more than your comfort. Did you catch that? He said, «Just say the last 10 percent because you need to value their calling more than your comfort.» Interesting, right? So, we need to say what needs to be said, but then there are times when we need to say it in the way it needs to be said. I think you can say something in a way that’s convincing without being condescending. I think so many times when we’re talking about conversations, there’s so much conversation on tone. I mean, there’s so much discussion about how to have conversations where you monitor your tone. Volume is important, but I think we need to be a little more flexible when it comes to tone because I believe tone articulates urgency. So, I think you can have flexibility in your tone without being disrespectful. Now, Darius, who’s your example on this? Jesus is my example in this. Do you remember when he said to Peter, «Get thee behind me, Satan?» How do you think he said that?
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