John K. Jenkins Sr - Practicing Forgiveness

What I want to talk to you about today is what's needed to maintain a long-term relationship with people , specifically in marriage. What 's going to make your marriage last ? What has enabled Trina Jenkins to stick with jacked-up John Jenkins for 33 years? I want to discuss that today . That 's why I want you to turn to the book of Philemon, the epistle from Paul the Apostle to Philemon.

What does it take? It takes more than money ; it takes more than a job; it takes more than good looks; it takes more than good sex. It takes something that y'all might not want to talk аbout: forgiveness. Don't clap now; y'all are too late. We're often not willing to forgive. It's become an oddity today for people to forgive , yet my wife has forgiven me for a whole heap of stuff. Just to set the record straight, I have forgiven her for a lot of things too. In order for a marriage to endure and for any relationship to survive , you 've got to be willing to forgive the other person for the wrong things they've done or for not doing the right things. Amen? I see what kind of message this is going to be with y'all right now. But that's the reality .

In the book of Philemon, I want to walk through this text. I'm going to cover verses 4 through 21 today ; that's most of the chapter . Let me give you the background of what this chapter is about so you can follow along. All I ask is for your attention right now; if y'all just give me until 2:45, I promise I'll be done by then.

So, Philemon- Paul is writing to him. Philemon has had one of his slaves , Onesimus, leave . Not only did he leave , but he also took some money from Philemon when he did. Now Paul is writing back to Philemon about Onesimus. As a matter of fact, Paul is encouraging Philemon to forgive Onesimus for what he has done. I think this is an important point to discuss. It 's a very powerful book; it's only one chapter long, but we ought to talk about forgiveness for a few moments , because it's not something that people readily and easily extend to others. We all want it; we all want people to forgive us, but we have a tough time forgiving others. Amen? Pastor , go ahead and preach!

As a matter of fact, you don't have to go searching for someone to offend you. Just live, and I promise you, someone will do something that will tick you off and rub you the wrong way. But it's in your best interest-be it your spouse or someone else-to forgive them and not become bitter. Bitterness will make you sick. I don't know if y'all have ever seen someone who might be beautiful , but they're so bitter that their face is so tight that ugliness takes over . I didn't call anybody ugly; I'm just saying, have you ever seen how bitterness hinders and hampers your prayers ? It weakens your relationship with God. In multiple places throughout scripture- Psalm 32, Proverbs 12, Proverbs 14, Proverbs 15, Proverbs 17-read through those books and you'll see verses that talk about the fact that if you don't forgive and allow bitterness to invade your life , it'll cause you to become sick and weak. A lot of people have a weak relationship with God because they're holding something against someone else.

Forgiveness means to lay it aside , let it go, forget about it. Let it alone; send it away . That 's what forgiveness means : to clear the record. Say that: clear the record. It means I'm not going to hold it against you . As a matter of fact, here's what Romans 12 says: God gives us a little insight. He says, "Vengeance is mine; I will repay." That 's what God says. So here's what that means: if someone has hurt you and done you wrong , God says don't try to pay them back. God says, "Vengeance is mine; I'll take care of them."

Now the problem is, if you're trying to pay them back , God says, "I see you got it handled, so I'll take my hands off ." Since you're going to pay them back, the problem is, with your payback, they will always do it again. But when God pays them back, they will never do it again . Woo! Amen! Can I get another amen from anybody ?

Yeah, it's time for us to stop paying back . As a matter of fact, some of you take delight in holding something over someone else's head who has wronged you . You enjoy making them your servants because of how they've wronged you; you take delight in that. So, the Lord , through Paul, talks to Philemon and wants him to forgive Onesimus, this runaway slave , for what it has cost him and for robbing him. There are several lessons to be learned , and I want to start reading in verse 4. Can I just walk down through ?