Dharius Daniels - I Hate It Here

Luke chapter 15, verse 17 is where I want to begin our time together today. Luke 15:17. As a matter of fact, we want to resource you—that’s part of the calling of our church. This is a spiritual pharmacy; that’s what we are. We produce transformational content that’s going to help you change your life. Throughout this series, each week, we’re going to be giving you tips for tough talks. Some of you are already signed up for our text list—we’re going to send that out to you. Others of you are thinking, «I don’t want you bothering me on my phone; don’t hit my line.» So, we will post it on our social media platforms and it will be on our website every single week. We’re going to give you new tips for tough talks, and we are pulling principles from Dr. Henry Cloud. We believe we’ll be better because of it.

Luke 15:17 says, «When he came to his senses, he said, 'How many of my father’s hired servants have food to spare, and here I am, starving to death! I will set out and go back to my father and say to him, „Father, I have sinned against heaven and you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired servants."' So he got up and went to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him. He ran to his son, threw his arms around him, and kissed him.» The crux of concern is found in verse 17 when the text says, «he came to his senses» and noted, «How many of my father’s servants have food to spare while I am starving to death?» I want to discuss this subject with you. I want you to put this in the chat with an exclamation point: «I hate it here!»

Today, we are inaugurating our exploration of what the scriptures say about tough talks, and our area of emphasis today is on how to have a tough talk with yourself. As I leap into this lesson, I want to begin with this sticky statement that they will put up on the screens for you: «Your evolution and your advancement are tied to your authenticity.» I’m going to say that one more time: «Your evolution and advancement are tied to your authenticity.» What am I saying? I’m saying, listen to me: you cannot live well if you will not get real. Wellness and realness are not mutually exclusive. I want you to catch this; it is essential because I think this is part of the intention of our eternal God—not just to expose us to Him, but to expose us to ourselves.

This is what theologian John Calvin says: «Spiritual growth is not just a journey toward God; it is also a journey toward self-discovery.» He’s saying, in essence, that I know I’m growing spiritually, not just by whether I can see God, but whether I can see myself. The question isn’t just, «Can I locate God?» The question is, «Can I locate myself?» Am I, watch this, grown enough spiritually to accurately identify where I am and then honestly assess how I feel about it? And then make a decision regarding what I’m going to do about it? I want you to catch this: God is grooming and growing us toward authenticity; however, we live in a cultural context that works aggressively and intentionally against the very trait God is trying to grow us into. While God is trying to grow us into authenticity, we live in a culture of superficiality.

People will tell you to be yourself and then punish you when you’re not like them. Do you want my opinion, or not? Or do you want your opinion in my words? You cannot tell me to be me on one hand and then punish me when I’m not like you. I believe the enemy is either orchestrating this or using it, similar to how he used an Old Testament character named Jezebel, who operated, watch this, in manipulation and intimidation. This whole idea of telling you to be you and then counseling you when you’re not like someone else is the enemy’s strategy to influence us, just like Jezebel influenced God’s people, pushing you to be someone you’re not because you’re operating out of fear regarding someone else’s reaction, rather than walking in faith and considering what brings God pleasure.

The Bible calls living this way, having the fear of man. This is what Solomon says about it in Proverbs 29:25: «The fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe.» He states that the fear of man is a snare; it’s a trap. You see the cheese, you go for the cheese, and you get trapped. It imprisons you to the opinions of other people who don’t even live by the same standards they are holding you to. They have expectations of you that they can’t even meet themselves and then punish you for having the courage to do what they are unwilling to do. Now, if you’re not ready to be you…