Dharius Daniels - How to Spot Toxic Traits and Protect Your Purpose

And here’s what I hear: for some of you, you’re in a season that requires unique attention to be given to your purpose. The issue with the relationships around you is whether or not they are draining you of the things that need to remain within you to fulfill what He is calling you to do in this season. Your relational life cannot be filled with drama if you wish to fulfill your destiny; it simply can’t happen—it’s too distracting. I said it’s too distracting! Am I making sense? It would be really hard to try to build this house while mine is falling apart. It would just be hard. Some of you are calling Judas Peter, and it is consuming your attention. Pastor, what does Judas look like? Here are three traits: he’s toxic. Here’s a trait, because if I don’t call these traits out, you’ll label it as imperfection, and it’s toxic. Number one: greed—it’s an insatiable and unrestrained appetite for more. Here’s a question, and I’m just telling you not just what I read in the Bible, but what I have put into practice in my own life: you must start making decisions regarding how you handle people based on how they handle your «no.» Your unwillingness to accept a «no» tells me there’s greed; they are only happy with your last «yes.» Greed precedes betrayal. They may not have betrayed you, but what did Judas betray Jesus for? Thirty pieces of silver—greed. He was already greedy because, as the keeper of the money, he was stealing from Jesus. You’ve got to be careful, because some things you’re calling spoiled are actually greed—wow, they’re 47; they’re not seven; they’re 47.

Number two: entitlement. This is the belief that one is owed something as a result of their association with someone who earned it. They didn’t earn it, but just because they’re around you and you did, they feel they are entitled to it. My dad said to me one time, «You don’t have a room in this house; don’t you come in my room.» He said, «You don’t have a room; I have a room that I let you stay in.» Y’all are not talking to me—stay out of my room! Lord, I don’t have time. The Bible says in John 12:4, «But one of His disciples, Judas Iscariot, who was later to betray Him, objected and said, ‘Why wasn’t this perfume sold and the money given to the poor? It’s worth a year’s wages! ’» He did not say this because he cared about the poor, but because he was a thief, and he was the keeper of the money bag, and he used to help himself to what was put in it. You see, entitled people think, «Wow, people are giving all this to Jesus; he’s not going to miss it.» How does that challenge your theology about Jesus’s poverty? Though I’m going to leave that alone—he was poor, but he wasn’t destitute.