Dharius Daniels - 5 Types of Boundaries

No one becomes accidentally great; greatness requires intentionality, and we cannot become great in relationships without being intentional. In this series, we’re going to raise our relational intelligence. Last week, we laid some foundational elements that I want to build upon. I want to get right into today’s lesson. Last week, I established this truth: listen to me, relational intelligence begins with boundaries. Yep, I covered that last week, and we’re going to dive a little deeper into that during our time together today. Please get your notes ready.

I also want to remind you real quick to press that like button; it helps us reach more people with this message. If anyone comes to your mind while I’m teaching who may benefit from this, just shoot them a text and share it, okay? If they’re on your heart, that may be God’s way of letting you know He wants to use you to help them get something they need in this season. Sometimes, people have needs they’re not openly discussing, which is why you must obey those promptings of the Spirit. Failing to obey is to quench the Spirit. So, please press that like and share button.

Additionally, if you haven’t signed up for my three-day challenge starting Sunday night, don’t miss it! It’s called «Dominate Your Year,» and I want to help you develop the attitude to do just that. We’ll address some mindset issues; you’ve got to have a mindset so that your higher self dominates your lower self. There are two versions of you: your higher self and your lower self. The Bible calls it the Spirit and the part influenced by the flesh. Your lower self embodies procrastination, people-pleasing, codependency, hypersensitivity, inconsistency—starting things and stopping them. Fear belongs to the lower self, while focus, dedication, discipline, determination, joy, and peace are characteristic of a life influenced by the Spirit, your higher self.

If you’re going to dominate your year, the higher version of you must dominate the lower version. The Bible refers to this as putting that lower self to death. I want to teach you how to do that; it takes more than just strength; it requires strategy. If strength were all it took, your higher self would already be dominating your lower self, but clearly, we need more than just strength. We need a strategy, don’t we? Additionally, you need an action plan for conquering your year. This begins with exercising dominion and mastering some competencies essential for living well and serving others successfully. Certain skills are necessary just to live well, so you’ve got to have dominion or mastery in those areas. We will assist you with that.

Anyway, go to dominateyouryear.live to sign up. I believe it will help you tremendously. Our focus today is Matthew 17, verse 1: «After six days, Jesus took with him Peter, James, and John, the brother of James, and led them up a high mountain by themselves.» Tonight, we are discussing five types of boundaries.

Let me start by establishing a theoretical and theological foundation for relational intelligence. If I don’t establish this, what I’m about to share about boundaries won’t resonate the way it needs to. Relational intelligence is the ability to define and properly align relationships. Someone please put that in the chat right now: define and align. It’s the ability, to use Jim Collins' language, to discern and determine who the right people are to get on my bus and how to place those right people in the right seats. We refer to this as «putting people in their place, ” but we don’t mean it in the sense of putting people down; rather, it means that even if someone is the right person for your life, it doesn’t automatically mean you should place them in the right position.

Let me say that one more time: just because they are the right people doesn’t mean you put them in the right place. Let me give you a practical example. If I can share an example, please say „yes“ in the chat. There are categories or spheres of intimacy and access that we discuss in relational intelligence: there’s the friends sphere, the associate sphere, the assignment sphere, and then the advisor sphere. One of the issues I’m getting ready to address is that many people have the right individuals in their lives but place them in the wrong spots. The people you date or marry, if you are a believer, should be those you are assigned to.